Transitions

Katherine Heigl

Dear Friends,

Right now, in my life, it is a time of transition. I have spent the last year and a half blissfully, and yes, sometimes painfully, embracing my domesticity and motherhood. However the time has come to go back to work which means my life, my time and my purpose will shift and compromises will have to be made. I will not always be there to kiss my girls goodnight or put the baby down. I will miss end of year school plays, choir concerts and even a birthday. I will not be there the day Joshua Jr. gains solid footing and toddles across the room for the first time. It goes without saying that the missing is hard. On me and my kids. I will not tell you it’s always worth it, it’s not, but it is the choice I made the day I welcomed my first baby into my heart. I chose to be a mother and I chose to continue to work. Truthfully, working and earning isn’t really an option. The choice is in how I decide to do that and the reality is, I’ve been acting since I was eleven years old. I have put in my 10,000 hours and it’s what I know and do best. Part of me would love to retire from the screen and be a mommy blogger who works from home. Though I imagine that is not without it’s trials and tribulations! Another part of me would be devastated to give up performing and storytelling. The old adage “Women can have it all” is a half truth that kind of pisses me off really. You may, as a woman, be able to have a successful career and a family but you are always, always compromising one for the other. I guess you can call it having it all, you just can’t have it all at once.

I am so grateful for the last 15 months and what it has meant to me and my family to be fully, wholly present. It has been a tremendous time of growth for me as a mother, wife and homemaker. I was able to settle into a family routine and ritual for the first time since having children and I relished taking back ownership of my home and family. For years I have had to share both with caregivers and nanny’s and rarely had enough of a break from work to take a breath, find some silence and determine with my husband how we’d like our ship to be run. This past year has been a true blessing in that it allowed me that breath and silence to fall into the rhythm of “our” routine. Day by day my confidence as a mother grew and now, despite leaving my gorgeous kids behind in Utah for the next month, I feel like I can easily and confidently step back in when time allows to reaffirm our way. I can’t begin to tell you what a relief that confidence is. The constant worry, guilt and shame that has accompanied my years as a working mother has been at times debilitating and has robbed me of so many perfectly imperfect moments with my kids. It always surprises me how long some lessons take me to learn, but I’m trying to give myself a break and be grateful that at least I had the wherewithal to learn it.

So back to transitions. Since my life is in transition and this is a lifestyle blog, it too will transition. The focus of Those Heavenly Days will shift a bit from crafting, cooking and hosting but will still honestly and authentically detail my lifestyle, my inspirations, my struggles, my lessons and of course my family. I’m planning a new series that will dive into what I am most deeply experiencing each month that I’m thinking will feel a bit like an edited version of a journal entry. No one wants to read the unedited version trust me! I’ll continue to curate my list of favorite artisan finds and can’t wait to explore Toronto for all their small batch, handmade artisanal treasures. I’m going to include you all in a day on the set from hair and makeup, to wardrobe to scene work. What my life looks like behind the camera is something I’m really excited to share since I’ve never done it before and it’s such a giant part of who I am. My crafting projects will be limited to what I can easily take with me to work and do on set between scenes so get ready for lots of knitting and crocheting!

I’m so excited for this shift in my life and the blog and can’t wait to share the journey with all of you. I am so grateful for the community Those Heavenly Days has created and for all of your continued support, encouragement and positivity. It has been incredibly fun for me to engage with all of you in this way and I could not be having a more positive experience doing so!

Stay tuned for my next post, and thank you again for taking the journey with me! XOXO, KT

Katherine Heigl with her husband Josh Kelley, children Naleigh, Adalaide and Joshua Jr., and niece Madison
Katherine Heigl
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42 Comments

  • Malika (Kika)

    Wow. You have a great talent in writing. I’m not a mother yet but I understand you. You did and still doing a great job. You are a wonderful human being and mom. But selfishly, please never retire (or in many many years) because you are too talented in acting. And I can see you directing and writing. I’m a fan and support you since Roswell.
    And it’s a pleasure to follow this journey with you and thanks to share so much with us. We really feel like we are your friend.
    Can’t wait to read what’s next and see you on my screen.

    Love from Paris

    Kika (it’s me who run the fanpage Katherine Heigl France on facrbook)

    April 9, 2018 at 11:23 am Reply
  • Pam

    I just wanted say to that I couldn’t agree more! I’m a Nurse, Navy veteran, Navy spouse and mom to three wonderful boys and have felt my share of guilt for not being home, but we’ve made it work and always find time for one another. Consistency and routine have been a big one for us especially when my husband was deployed. It isn’t always easy, but we make it work. I love being a nurse and working and also love being a mom. Love your blog! You have a beautiful family!

    April 9, 2018 at 11:36 am Reply
  • Teresa Smith

    I just sold my Bernina shop and am transitioning to stay at home and preparing to meet my first grandchild! I so look forward to seeing your knitting projects!

    April 9, 2018 at 11:41 am Reply
  • Gina Ortiz

    Katherine! I am sooo excited for you and your transition! Nothing worthwhile is ever easy, and no matter what we choose to do we are always compromising the quality and time of being somewhere else that is why we only give our all to what we love! What we are good at, what gives us a sense of purpose and fulfillment! I appreciate all your sacrifices in getting to your projects and inspiring me every step of the way because seeing you on the set of every amazing t.v show or movie is absolutely motivating for me. I once heard children grow out of separation anxiety fairly quickly however, we can never really say the same for mommies. That is what makes mommies so special, incredible, and essential to our futures because no matter where we go whether mom is there or not, she is always with us. You’ve built an amazing family and I am certain they are so proud of you. Thank you for continuing to write on your beautiful journey! Love you!!!!! Congratulations on all of your accomplishments!!! Blessings to your family!!! xoxoxoxoxoxoxo-Gina from the Bronx

    April 9, 2018 at 11:58 am Reply
  • Leeann

    I am so excited to watch you on Suits, and see lots of pics of behind the scenes, your explorations of Toronto, and your knitting projects. As a mother of 2 grown children who worked as I raised them, I can relate to your feelings, but if there is one thing I truly believe, it’s that following your heart and your dreams will always make you a better mother and wonderful example for your children. Your instincts will never fail you!

    April 9, 2018 at 12:07 pm Reply
  • Jackie Roisler

    Sending prayer blessings your way as you travel down this different road.
    As already mentioned, your talent with expressing yourself with the written word truly holds my respect high for you. That I’m a friend, thank you.
    Looking forward to your future “behind the scene” sharing.
    Jackie in NC

    April 9, 2018 at 12:56 pm Reply
  • Katerina

    It´s reassuring to read that all working mothers deal with the same problems and doubts, no matter what their income is. I don´t think you can ever have it all, you can only do your best. And I know it has been a good day when I collapse into bed at night and feel this inner happiness when I look at my children sleeping in their bedroom, no matter how exhausted /a lot/ I feel. Sharing is so much better than competing. Good luck to all of us.

    April 9, 2018 at 2:44 pm Reply
  • Gisselle

    I think all working moms feel the same. I’m about to enter back into that world soon after a very long hiatus to be a full time stay at home Mom. I changed careers in the midst of it all as well and schooling is almost over and the working world awaits. I applaud you for stating “we can have it all, even though not at the same time” Motherhhod is a journey and hard one full of compromises, but also a rewarding one. Just remember this: Those moments when you’re home and reunited with your gorgeous babies and hubby once again, those moments will be even more memorable and even more special.. Can’t wait to see you slay in “Suits”!!!!!

    April 9, 2018 at 3:13 pm Reply
  • Natalie

    Katherine, thank you for being so real and willing to share all your life moments, interests and just who you are. I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, you have been my favorite actress and its been amazing to see what you are like off camera. It’s been nice to relate to you! I can’t wait to see what your life is like in between takes, so neat! Keep shining and pushing on. Somehow when we are missing family and can’t be with them, God gives us a strength we never thought we had 🙂 Keep remembering who you are-that is fearfully and wonderfully made in Christ! Love you, Katherine!

    Natalie K

    April 9, 2018 at 3:17 pm Reply
  • caroline

    so excited to see you back on screen, you’ve been one of my favorites since “My Father the Hero”!
    Looking forward to what you continue to post and share on your blog, and whenever you need some island beauty spoiling, check us out: etsy.com/shop/islandgirlskin 🙂

    April 9, 2018 at 3:36 pm Reply
  • Armanda Barone

    What a beautiful family and life you have created. There will always be sacrifices. You can see how happy and loved your children are. Looking back they will remember that, but also understand the importance of pursuing what you love in terms of a career. So in awe of you and what you have created.

    April 9, 2018 at 5:19 pm Reply
  • Christy

    We love you and the precious family you and Josh have cultivated. I, too, have always loathed that phrase that women can “have it all”…because nobody can truly have it all, all at once–something always suffers, or at least doesn’t get the attention it needs or deserves..luckily you have a wonderful support system and those daily rituals in place for a happy home and happy children, so that they know you are there even when you are not physically present. Always a fan…love!!

    April 9, 2018 at 8:22 pm Reply
  • jillian

    A really nice post, you speak so well to the mom/work dilemma. From my lofty perch of 67 years I truly admire that you are choosing to keep this creative part alive for your self, and you will be very grateful that you have when your children fly the nest. I was happy to stay home with the kiddos, but there was always a little part of me that felt overly contained. Did someone say Suits? Awesome! I haven’t watched in a few years but will now…will you be a villain or other? Looking forward to seeing you there.

    April 9, 2018 at 9:30 pm Reply
  • Lisa Edds

    Oh gosh, change/transition is so hard! Usually I accept change while I’m kicking and screaming 🙂 I’m thrilled you are letting us come along with you on this new journey.

    April 10, 2018 at 1:20 am Reply
  • Micki Butler

    Congrats on your decision! I am confident you can find the perfect balance and accomplish all you want to do. It sounds like an exciting time, and I can’t wait to read about it.

    April 10, 2018 at 4:56 am Reply
  • Jenni

    God bless your hearts. Best of luck on this new chapter.

    April 10, 2018 at 7:23 pm Reply
  • Joanne

    Yay!Best wishes on this next chapter!!!

    April 11, 2018 at 9:58 am Reply
  • Cassandra Stewart

    I am excited to see and follow through your next chapter of life. Seeing the behind the on sets will be amazing to see you action. Good luck to you and your next chapter. We are rootn for ya!

    April 11, 2018 at 1:54 pm Reply
  • Ivona

    Dear Katherine,
    I wish you all the best in your next adventure!
    Stay just the way you are, we will be with you along the way. Looking forward to your new posts.
    Love,
    Ivona

    April 11, 2018 at 2:51 pm Reply
  • Lisa @ Lisa3D.com

    Wishing you lots of luck in this new transition. I’m looking forward to continuing to read about how your life evolves!

    April 12, 2018 at 5:38 pm Reply
  • Charlotte

    Katherine you are amazing! You are so talented too so I couldn’t imagine you having to quit acting to be just a mummy!! It’s so hard to juggle it all isn’t it! Us mum’s have to though as you say! We can’t have it all at once without feeling so completely guilty that we are not doing enough or enjoying our life how we want to!! I’m a mummy but I always feel like ‘is this all I do now’ I had such a good career and life before and now it’s so good but so different. You need your time to so what you want on your own as well as with your kids!! Your amazing!! Keep being you! X

    April 12, 2018 at 10:44 pm Reply
  • Ashley Ellis

    I have been a stay at home mother to four for almost two years now. It can be very challenging at times, but also very rewarding. I am about to go back into the workforce and focus on becoming an RN. I have also done a few background jobs in movies and loved it. I believe that you are extremely talented and can’t wait to see you back on the big screen.

    April 12, 2018 at 10:53 pm Reply
  • Kathryn

    I couldn’t have said it better!! Momma’s don’t have 200% of themselves. We can’t be 100% at home being a momma and 100% at work being the career woman we were before littles. Somewhere there is compromise! Hope your transition goes well!

    April 12, 2018 at 11:37 pm Reply
  • Mama Emily

    I love reading your blog. I had a baby a few months after you and can relate to so much that you’ve shared. Also I live in the suburbs of Toronto and am a big Suits fan so I can’t wait to see your face on the show and hear what you think of your finds in Toronto. Staying home with your children is a beautiful blessing, working and a career is important too. Don’t be too hard on yourself for pursuing your career, your children will love you all the same and you will all learn to make the most of your precious time together. You’ve got this Mama!
    I just found I’m getting laid off so I won’t be returning to work at the end of my maternity leave (we get a whole year off in Canada), and will enjoy a few extra months of blissful and not-so-blissful months with my babe. Good luck and happy writing, spring should come to us soon I hope!

    April 13, 2018 at 1:38 am Reply
  • Bonnie K

    You’re totally not oversharing… Just being a real live person sharing!!! I think the first movie I saw you in was “Love Comes Softly” so many years ago. Lol! It’s been fun to watch your career and I’ve always admired you. However, there is something so much more wonderful about the less glossy, “warts and all” self you have shared. It’s nice to know that wherever we are in life, being a Mom is brutiful. It’s just hard and so good at the same time and I don’t know if it’s possible to separate those two emotions. In every season with my kids, I find I’m letting go of things I loved and finding NEW things to love. I hope this next season is connected to your family and is filled with moments that surprise you in their sweetness. I’m looking forward your blogs next chapter! 🙂

    April 13, 2018 at 1:53 am Reply
  • Tara

    I just want you to know that, as a full time working single mom, I totally and 100% agree. I have it all, but not all at once, and it devastates me on a daily basis. Not working, for me, is not an option, but if it were I know I would revel in being a mother more than I already do, and I would still find an extra curricular to get me out of the house now and then. Bottom line: we, as mothers can never have it all at the same time.

    April 13, 2018 at 3:08 am Reply
  • Cara Hoff

    You rock that working mama thing! You’re so right- women can have it all just doesn’t fit in with reality. Sending you all the good vibes to conquer Mom guilt, tackle your work (I’ve missed seeing you on screen btw) and love love love those babies in whatever way you can.

    I’ve recently booked a trip to Scotland, my first ever overseas trip, something I’ve dreamed of doing since elementary school. I still haven’t quite gotten rid of my guilt yet. But I’m trying to remember it’s only 11 days. Haha. No matter how short a time you’re away- it’s a struggle finding yourself again sometimes after immersing yourself into motherhood. So send me some good vibes/ prayers/ whatever you’re into back to me!

    April 13, 2018 at 3:31 am Reply
  • Stephanie

    Beautifully and inspiring written piece of art

    April 13, 2018 at 5:38 am Reply
  • Kelsey

    You are an amazing mom and an amazing actress ❤️❤️

    April 13, 2018 at 1:43 pm Reply
  • Cacia McDougall

    Thank you for being real— it’s what we mom’s love most about other moms . And tearing down that “ perfect “ mom persona that never happens . As a mom of four , now almost all teens, and contemplating going to work full time once the youngest is in high school in 2 years, ( been working part time for a few years ) I’ve so enjoyed the time at home. To be “ present” with my kids and there for what they’ve needed me for. I’ve always known that I would put in whatever time I needed for when they were younger and then as they matured “ mom” could start exploring what I wanted to do, have “ me” time more and more . It will ALWAYS be a balancing act, and I’ve learned to accept that if there are goals I want to now go for , that they are old enough to cope- and even if they were still a little younger , and opportunities for me arose, I have an amazing husband who would help out where needed.
    I love how beautifully and realistically you spoke- and will continue to follow where your journey leads – enjoy Toronto- it’s only about an hour from me, so am there often and consider it to be one of the best places in the world . My tips on best spots to visit/eat? ( over and over !) Kensington Market, Distillery District , Chinatown, and Greektown. If you search for Afghan food- they have some of the best!
    Recommendation of places to eat? Ice cream- def Bang Bang on ossington- all homemade . Vietnamese fashion – Bahn mi Boys- several
    Locations . The food trucks in TO are taking off and so many ethnicities , so those are fab! For some amazing Latin American food- Kensington market is the best. (also stock up on goodies from St Lawrence Market!)
    Have a blast there and all the best!!!❤️

    April 13, 2018 at 2:13 pm Reply
  • heather in arizona

    Life and motherhood are never clean linear paths, they are full of transitions and lessons to learn. All you can ever do for yourself, your spouse and your kids is your best…and that can look different from day to day. More power to you and your family as you redefine your normal.

    I look forward to you sharing the details of a day in the life of a working actress. I’ve always been curious to see behind the glamour of being a “movie star”.

    April 13, 2018 at 3:40 pm Reply
  • Tejasvi

    Love reading your blog! My mom says she went through something similar when she went back to work. Except back then, the Indian society was such that working women were looked down upon so much so that she was shamed for leaving me and was implied to be a bad mother. I liked this post especially since it gave me some loads of perspective on what my mom went through. Looking forward to then next one!

    April 13, 2018 at 6:15 pm Reply
  • ha young

    Hi, l’m Korean. I saw your blog by chance. As I looked your blog, I feel there are a lot of things to learn from you. Even if I don’t have a vocation as mother, I understand maternal love. Also you look respectful in spite of hardship . Please write many articles now and forever. Even though it is short English, I hope my sincere feelings delivered.

    April 15, 2018 at 4:56 pm Reply
  • Kid Friendly

    You described so well the constant struggling between the worklife and mom’s life, the balance we never really find and the guilt often there…
    Hugs from France

    April 17, 2018 at 8:55 am Reply
  • Madi

    I just love you, Katherine!

    April 17, 2018 at 3:34 pm Reply
  • Ploy.S

    Can’t wait to see the transition on this blog! I’m really glad you decide to also share your experience on set 🙂 Looking forward to read every post from you! Love you Katie

    April 17, 2018 at 3:49 pm Reply
  • Hilary

    I love and appreciate this. Even as someone who isn’t a mother, I can definitely relate to this feeling of transition and of sometimes leaving home and the people you love because there’s a bigger call in your heart. You’ve got this.

    April 18, 2018 at 1:21 pm Reply
  • Debbie

    Can’t wait to see your next adventure!!!

    April 20, 2018 at 2:23 pm Reply
  • Shannon Zappettini

    Katherine,

    I am so excited to see your next adventure. As a mom of 2 littles, change and transition is inevitable. I agree that we as women can have it all, just not all at once. Becoming a mom changes us, it makes us better people. It gives us a sense of love and completeness. But it doesn’t take away our wants and dreams. We can be moms and anything else we want to be. I think you are an amazing mother. I have followed your journey. You have handled motherhood and a career beautifully. I look forward to seeing what your future holds for you.

    May 23, 2018 at 3:20 am Reply
  • Abby

    You do you and do not feel guilty about it! You deserve a career and a home. Congrats on Suits!

    June 3, 2018 at 1:55 am Reply
  • Glory

    I am so excited to watch what comes next. I loved Suits before and you’ll make it that much better. I’m sure you will manage the career and family with grace and beauty. I’m so happy you got to spend the time with your family. There is nothing like it.

    June 18, 2018 at 4:23 pm Reply
  • Daniela

    I am new following your blog and I’m enjoying reading it so far! I’m looking forward to reading your craft, design and lifestyle tips. I too enjoy ‘creating a mood’ by decorating. It’s important to feel peace and coziness wherever we lay our hat. I never saw Suits before, but since I found out you are on it, I will be tuning in! BTW, welcome to Toronto 🙂

    July 22, 2018 at 3:38 am Reply
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